Conjugal Rights

The sacred contract of marriage, which according to the laws of nature is the most pleasurable, has not absolved men and women of their responsibilities in this holy relationship. It has tied man and his wife in the chain of conjugal rights. It scrapped all those laws prevalent in the period of ignorance and found in extremes in other civilization by which a woman would become a pawn in her husband's hands. Islam advised them to take their marriage seriously, fulfill their responsibilities and pay appropriate attention to each other’s' rights. So that their offspring’s would be saved from destruction in the cesspool of corruption.

A Woman's Rights over Her Husband

The principle duty of a man is to provide food, clothing, shelter and all other basic needs of his wife according to his ability and capacity. All this should be done with love and kindness

The principle duty of a man is to provide food, clothing, shelter and all other basic needs of his wife according to his ability and capacity. All this should be done with love and kindness by which their relationship will glow and become stronger. He should always support his wife with courage and bravery so that she may feel a sense of security. Also he must guard her chastity and modesty, while overlooking her minor faults and errors which are inevitable.

As Mullah Mohsin Faiz Kashani in his book “Al-Waafi” in the chapter of “A Woman's right over her husband” writes that it is narrated from the Holy Prophet (s.a) that some people enquired from him regarding the rights of a wife over her husband. He (s.a) answered:

He should overlook her minor faults and if she commits a major mistake then he should forgive her."

We all know that human life is not confined to food and drinks. Rather love, affection and sacrifice are the emotions which take humanity to great heights and form the core of its civilisation and culture. A woman whose emotions personified along with her other necessities expects to see the smiling face of her husband when he returns to his house. This is one of her basic rights which has not been overlooked due to its importance by the religion of Islam and therefore it is enumerated as one of her rights over her husband.

We all know that human life is not confined to food and drinks. Rather love, affection and sacrifice are the emotions which take humanity to great heights and form the core of its civilisation and culture. A woman whose emotions personified along with her other necessities expects to see the smiling face of her husband when he returns to his house. This is one of her basic rights which has not been overlooked due to its importance by the religion of Islam and therefore it is enumerated as one of her rights over her husband.
Shahab Abdo Rabbeh relates that I asked Imam al-Sadiq (a.s) concerning the rights of a woman over her husband. He (a.s) answered:

He should fulfil all her basic necessities and must not terrrorise her by becoming angry time and again. If he does this i.e. after fulfilling her needs, is kind and affectionate towards her, then I swear by God, he has fulfilled his wife's rights." (Kafi).

Among the other rights which a women enjoys over her husband is that he should sleep with her. This matter has been dealt in detail in the books of jurisprudence. Those who are interested can refer to Al-Kafi, Wasailush Shia, Mustadrak and other similar books.

The importance of these rights can be gauged from the basic expectation of the fairer sex that her husband treat her kindly and respectfully. He must give due importance to her rights and observe them. The Holy Prophet (s.a) himself has endorsed this view by saying:

The best among you is the one who observes the rights of his wife in the best possible way and I am the best among you to observe the rights of my wives.” (Man la Yahzoroh al-Faqeeh).

Husband's Rights over His Wife

The rights of a husband over his wife are numerous. The most important among them is related to having physical relationship with her. The duty of a wife is to submit herself physically before her husband. This right of the husband i.e. of having a physical relationship with his wife as and when he wants is obviously a reciprocation of her feelings. In absence of her husband the duties of the wife include the protection of his rights, status, wealth and respect. She must not spend his wealth without his permission nor must she reveal his secrets. Rather she should be his closest confidante.
She must not let anybody inside the house without his permission in his absence. For, doing so would lead to a lot of misunderstandings which would have drastic repercussions on the sacred contract of marriage. She must value his ideas, plans and provisions that he has prepared for her and other family members.

Let us glance through a very important tradition from our fifth Imam, Imam Muhammad al-Baqir (a.s) in this regard. One day a lady enquired from the Holy Prophet (s.a) regarding the rights a husband enjoys over his wife. He (s.a) answered:

First and foremost is that she should obey him and refrain from disobedience. She must not donate anything from the house without his permission nor can she keep recommended fasts without his approval. She must never deny him his physical rights nor deprive him of it's pleasures. If she steps out of the house without his permission, the angels of the heaven and the earth, of wrath and mercy, curse her till she returns to her house." [Makaarem al-Akhlaq]