Recently, many parts of the world celebrated Mother’s Day, focusing on the important role of mothers in family especially in the process of bringing up the children. While all religions and all societies have given parents an honorable status but Islam gives mothers much more honorable status as compared to other religions. Islam commands kindness, respect and obedience to parents, and specifically emphasizes and gives preference to the mother as shall be shown in this article.
Despite the fact that Islam gives parents, especially mothers, such honorable status; there is a single exception according to which the children must not obey their parents. According to the Quranic teachings, regarding parents, it is important to understand that being good to one's parents begins right from the worship of God. Allah says:
"Worship Allah and join not any partners with Him; and be kind to your parents..." [1]
Actually, Quran mentions the fact that
“We have enjoined on man kindness to his parents; in pain did his mother bear him, and in pain did she give him birth.” [2]
But at the same time almighty Allah (J) makes an exception to the above command in the following verse:
“We have enjoined on man kindness to his parents; but if they strive (to force) thee to join with Me anything of which thou hast no knowledge, obey them not.” [3]
It is due to the importance of monotheism in Islamic teachings that Quran commands Muslims not to obey their parents if they force them to join anything with almighty Allah (J). According to the holy Quran we must not obey our parents in all things rather the obedience of mother and father must be in accordance with the principle of divine unity. Except to this single exception all Muslims must obey and respect their parents because Gratitude to God is incomplete without showing gratitude to one’s parents.
At the end, I would like to bring a great Hadith narrated from Imam Jawad (AS):
Bakr the son of Salih narrates the following story:
My son in law wrote Imam Javad (PBUH) a letter which included the following: "My father has great animosity with Prophet Muhammad's progeny (PBUT). His belief is corrupted, and he mistreats me to a great extent.My Master, I first like to request your prayer on my behalf, and second to ask for your suggestions on how to deal with this matter. Should I inform others of his corrupted thoughts or of his mistreatments to me? Or should I compromise and remain patient with him?"
It is due to the importance of monotheism in Islamic teachings that Quran commands Muslims not to obey their parents if they force them to join anything with almighty Allah (J). According to the holy Quran we must not obey our parents in all things rather the obedience of mother and father must be in accordance with the principle of divine unity. Except to this single exception all Muslims must obey and respect their parents because Gratitude to God is incomplete without showing gratitude to one’s parents.
Imam Javad (PBUH) wrote in his reply:
"I understand the situation between you and your father. Allah willing, I will not forget to pray for you, but do bear in mind that for you, patience and good manners are far better than revealing (that which is bad). Do remember, after every hardship there will be relief. Be patient, and the good end belongs to the pious. May Allah keep you persistent in your love towards the Prophet's progeny. We and you are under the shelter of Allah, and surely He will protect His sheltered people.
Bakr continues: After this incident, my son in law's father changed completely, and I never saw him disagree with his son's beliefs from thereon.[4]
"I understand the situation between you and your father. Allah willing, I will not forget to pray for you, but do bear in mind that for you, patience and good manners are far better than revealing (that which is bad). Do remember, after every hardship there will be relief. Be patient, and the good end belongs to the pious. May Allah keep you persistent in your love towards the Prophet's progeny. We and you are under the shelter of Allah, and surely He will protect His sheltered people.
[1] Chapter 4, verse 36. وَاعْبُدُواْ اللّهَ وَلاَ تُشْرِكُواْ بِهِ شَيْئًا وَبِالْوَالِدَيْنِ إِحْسَانًا
[2] Chapter 46, verse 15. وَوَصَّيْنَا الْإِنسَانَ بِوَالِدَيْهِ إِحْسَانًا حَمَلَتْهُ أُمُّهُ كُرْهًا وَوَضَعَتْهُ كُرْهًا
[3] Chapter 29, verse 8. وَوَصَّيْنَا الْإِنسَانَ بِوَالِدَيْهِ حُسْنًا وَإِن جَاهَدَاكَ لِتُشْرِكَ بِي مَا لَيْسَ لَكَ بِهِ عِلْمٌ فَلَا تُطِعْهُمَا
[4] The Stories of Bihar al-Anwaar
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